Processing...

You know how the computer gets too much information or tries to open too many objects and it tells you "PROCESSING" along with the gif of the hourglass?  That's how I'm feeling; I'm attempting to process everything I've seen and experienced over the past five weeks.  I have no idea where to start to begin telling the story of this journey.  

Fortunately, I kept a journal, and was zealous about writing in it nearly daily.  So if I wanted to, I could detail each day for you.  I think I'll resist that urge, though, and keep it to broad impressions and a few specific stories.

I've been to Sweden four times; as an exchange student in 1991/1992, visits to my host family in 1999 and 2003, and this 5 week visit.  When I was an exchange student, I didn't want to return to America.  It felt like a sentence passed by a stern judge; as punishment for being born in the United States, you must return there.  I have a very hard time being objective about Sweden, and I would still like to live there, very much.  So many things they do make sense and work so well; and yet, for the first time ever while visiting, I could see the cracks on the surface of a not-perfect society.  

Every other time I've been to Sweden, I've been supremely reluctant to leave.  This time, as our departure date approached, I had mixed emotions.  I wanted to come home.  I missed my husband.  I got tired of living out of a suitcase.  I was tired of having my daily schedule set by someone else, and tired of being dependant on someone else to drive.  (The team was not permitted to drive in Sweden.)  I also wanted to stay, as usual.   Nothing new there; what was new was that I thought long and hard about just what, exactly, I would do for a living in Sweden. The short answer to that is: I don't know.  My Swedish Mama would love it if I lived there, and I have an existing network of contacts, too.  That certainly doesn't guarantee employment, however.

Quickly, the big changes that I noticed....

1.  There is more English in the Swedish language.  

When I made this observation, Mama said, "Yeah, and in 30 years, the Swedish language will disappear."   I don't agree with that assessment, but she's partly right.  They don't even realize that they're sprinkling everyday conversation with English words...prime example?  I sat in the terminal at Hven Traffiken, a ferry that runs between Landskrona, Sweden, and the island of Hven.  I was early that day, and waited for the rest of the team inside because it was chilly.  I deliberately eavesdrop when I'm in Sweden; my excuse is that I'm improving my language skills, and even if a conversation is deeply private, the chances of me ever meeting (or hell, even seeing) these people again is nil.  Anyway.   I was eavesdropping on the conversation between the clerk at the ticket window, and a woman inquiring about the schedule of the ferry and ticket pricing.  As the clerk detailed the information the woman answered by saying, "Ja.  Ja.  Javisst.  Yes.  Yes.  Ja.  Ja."  You don't need to speak Swedish to spot the impostors in that phrase.  Responding to a yes-no question by saying "yes-yes" in English isn't uncommon, or even noticed by native speakers.  

When I was an exchange student, it was cool for kids to use bits and pieces of English, but that was something that they did intentionally, for attention.  This is not the same thing, but I guess if you're not observing the phenomenon, it would seem like nothing new.  Whenever I pointed out the increase in the use of English, though, my hosts would say that it was hardly surprising, considering the increase of use of computers, the rise of the Internet, and the rising cooperation between Sweden and Denmark, since the Öresund Bridge opened in the early 2000s.  

2.  The popular game of "Blame the Immigrants" is sadly on the rise.

Sweden accepts refugees from many war-torn regions of the globe, and because the Swedish population is mostly the same ethnicity, foreigners stick out like the proverbial sore thumb.  Being "different" is not desirable.   Sweden is a welfare state; refugees get an enormous amount of help from the government in the form of: providing someplace to live, Swedish as a second language classes for free, money for food, utilities, schooling for their children, and free medical care.  Who wouldn't want to come to Sweden from places like Bosnia, Iraq, Somalia?  But then after opening those doors, the Swedes get vastly annoyed by refugees then bringing their entire extended family into the country, and the fact that many refugees don't work and form expatriate societies.  Shocker, right?  Shell-shocked people from warring countries band together in a foreign country.  Huh.  Whoda thunk it?  This game of blaming immigrants for rising crime and flagging property rates irritates the living hell out of me.  All of your society's ills can not be placed at the feet of a small number of foreigners.  If that is indeed the problem, then to me, it seems that there's quite a simple solution: quit allowing people to immigrate.  Wow.  That was tough.  As an American citizen, I can't just decide that I want to move to Sweden.  I need to a) have a job waiting, b) marry a Swede, or c) have a lot of money.  Believe me, during the Bush administration, I thought often about applying for political asylum, but that really isn't even possible.  If however, I'm fleeing war or political persecution, getting a residence permit in Sweden isn't as hard.  Change those laws, and you solve the problem, right?  I know, it is hardly that simple.

3.  Somewhere, in the last 5 years since I've been there, Sweden completely revamped their postal system, and local post offices are a thing of the past.

IMNSHO, this is BRILLIANT.  The postal system operates sorting facilities, and still employs letter carriers.  But if you want stamps, or to mail a package, they've outsourced that to grocery stores, convenience stores, and lottery outlets.  It is still official Swedish Post; but they slashed operating costs by billions.

I sent postcards home, lots of them.  After we'd been there for a few days, I started looking for a post office, because I needed stamps.  The logo is easy to recognize; a blue horn on a yellow field.  I looked EVERYWHERE.  Finally, out of frustration, I asked one of our drivers if she could help me find a post office.  She looked at me like I had three heads, and then burst out laughing.  "When were you here last?" she asked, still giggling.  

"Five years ago," I said, mystified.  

"Oh, yeah, then you wouldn't know," she told me.  "We lost all the post offices a few years ago.  It was huge news.  You didn't hear about it?  Your family in Kungsör didn't tell you?"

"Um, no...we usually talk family news, births, deaths, weddings..." I trailed off, feeling dumb.  

But that's the truth.  I seldom -if ever- discuss the news in the US or in Sweden when I call them.  So the closure of several thousand post offices was not on my radar.  Once I was clued in, the official retailers were easy to spot...same logo, just smaller, and instead of "Sveriges Post" (Sweden's Mail) the signs said "Post erbjudande" (Postal retailer).

4.  The murder rate, and crime in general, is on the rise.

One of our official visits was to a regional police headquarters, and we met both the regional chief of police and the information officer, i.e., press secretary.  I asked them point-blank what they attribute the rising murder rate to, and they both told me murders are on the decline.  There's just more media attention when someone is murdered.  Riiiiiiiight.  There's a bridge in Brooklyn for sale, too.  I don't think they were lying to me; I think they're lying to themselves.  Statistics can be spun any way the wind blows.  I don't know what the deciding factor in that increase is, but I am very sorry to see it.

5.  In the same vein of things that I'm sorry to see, huge retail outlets on the outskirts of towns are also on the rise.

Think Super-Wal-Mart.  These huge "varuhusar" are something new for me in Sweden; my small Swedish hometown had a town center, and a shopping street closed to vehicle traffic.  Most if not all Swedish cities had the same layout.  Sadly, the big retailers are doing the same thing they've done here in the states:  they're killing the mom-and-pop shops, killing the traditional butchers and cheese shops, along with small and unique stores in very small retail space.

Finally....

6.  The Eurovision Song Contest is still a completely ridiculous circus of insane pageantry and silly music.

And I loved every minute of it.

Over the coming weeks, you'll hear lots more about all of this, I'm sure.  For now, though, I'm processing.

Everyone else is doing it....

so why shouldn't I?

Running their mouths about the whole Paris Hilton thing, that is. Nancy Grace, on Headline News. The President Idiot-worshiping fools on Fox. Larry King on CNN. But honestly, I feel like adding my two cents worth is just adding to unneeded hype. And telling the world how I feel about it isn't adding anything to the debate either. Do I feel bad for Paris? Sure. A little. Does she deserve to be in jail? Yep. Do the crime, do the time. But I do have to agree with one of the talking heads I saw on the news, who said something like "Do you think that you would see anything like this for a similar crime, a misdemeanor, that a sheriff's department would go and get someone for a regular person?" No, I don't. I think absolutely everyone involved in this whole sorry mess is desperately trying to wring their 15 minutes of fame out of it. Which is sad, frankly.

Obviously, the young woman needs help. I disagree with another of the talking heads, who said that she couldn't see any way for Paris's career to recover from this. First of all, WHAT CAREER? She's famous for being famous, although she has been in several movies, recorded an album, done some modeling. But not only does she not need the money, being one of the heirs to the Hilton hotel chain, I don't think she's all that interested in working, really working, for a living.

But let's allow the ugly, brutal truth to come out. I think she's beautiful, and I freely admit to a tiny bit of jealousy, of her beauty, youth, and wealth. I also think she's either not very bright or crazy like a fox, laughing all the way to the bank. You decide for yourself.

Scooter's been sentenced t'JAIL!

Scooter Libby has been sentenced to 30 months in jail for being the biggest blabbermouth in history. Also perhaps the most forgetful person in history, his testimony recorded in depositions that were played at his trial were rife with "I don't recall(s)" and "I don't remember(s)."

I have said before that I firmly believe that President Idiot will pardon Scooter either as one of his last official acts as president in 2009 or more likely that he will issue a pardon before Scooter even serves one day in jail.

I think he should go to jail. I think he should serve every single day of his sentence. I don't think he ought to get any special treatment because he is famous (or infamous, as the case may be). He had no right to leak the name of a CIA agent, but he did it anyway. Then, when he was caught out, he worked hard to obstruct the investigation into his wrongdoing.

I feel for the agent that he outed. Here she was, pursuing her chosen career, by all accounts she was good at it and liked it, and the Idiot Administration fucks it up for her. Thank Yew Dubya! Way to go!

However, I also think that the Veep should have been charged with something, (don't ask me what, I'm not a legal expert) because I'd be willing to bet Paris Hilton's inheritance that Scooter didn't come up with the brilliant plan to out Ms. Plame all by his lonesome little self, I'm sure that plan came from on high.

There are 593 days left in the Bush presidency. I found a countdown clock!

When is it enough?

I want to rant and rave about the massacre in Virginia, say bunches of things about guns, and how the University didn't handle it as well as they should have in the early hours, but none of that will change the fact that one person ruthlessly took 33 lives. I don't like guns, but the lack of enforcement of gun control laws is not to blame here. One person is. One person who was legally able to obtain the guns that he used; he was over 18, not a convicted felon, and the system, in this case, is not the problem. I'm sure he would have easily passed any background check anyone cared to run. He had a legal right to possess all the guns that he owned. I'm not suggesting that he shouldn't have had that right. But your right to own a gun does not extend to pointing it anyone and pulling the trigger, completely unprovoked. It certainly does not extend to killing 33 people.

Much like child abuse mystifies me, violence does as well. I have a tough time wrapping my head around things like this. I'm not alone in that, I know. Even President Idiot's speech writers managed to do a decent job yesterday, having him tell the grieving Virginia Tech community that there was no way to make sense of a tragedy like this. Astonishingly, I didn't even hear any grammar errors in his speech.


Remember Don Henley's Dirty Laundry song from the 1980s?

Get the widow on the set
We need dirty laundry

I'm watching CNN interview the brother of one of the victims, and he's not completely broken down, but he's a mess. Because you would be. Why do we do this, every time there's a tragedy? Why is there an insatiable appetite for sobbing family members? Can we not let these people grieve in private?

Why does this not happen in Canada, England, Europe? Hell, it doesn't happen in most of the rest of the world. Why is it America that has school shootings? When will it stop? When is it ENOUGH? How do we stop it?


I wish I had some answers.

Running Down A Dream

Before I get to my usual Tuesday Brain Dump, I need to point your attention to this piece on NPR, heartbreaking in its simplicity, about the shootings yesterday at Virginia Tech. Audio isn't available as I am writing this post, but will be later today. Judith Miller says so eloquently what I struggle to put into words. Give it a listen.





I'm thinking today about running, and the 'runner's high'

I'm still only able to run for 10 minutes out of the 35 that I'm on the treadmill. Some days are easier than others. I don't know why. My routine varies only by a small amount each day; get up, get dressed, go to the gym, come home, shower, get dressed for work, work, drive home, dinner, write, bed. Tuesdays and Thursdays there's an exercise class in between dinner and writing. That's about it. I drink a ton of water each day. I'm watching my portions and eating healthy. So why is it that some days are super easy and some so incredibly tough? I wish I understood.

I have been a runner for a very long time, but taken very long breaks in between times when I run and times when I don't. I was on the track team in junior high school, 7th grade? Or was it 8th? Too long ago to remember now. The junior high school in my hometown was on a tree-lined street, which has about 10 century houses on it, and in fact the original portion of the school is a historic building as well, was at one time a private college. A very, very, very small one. At the end of the school's street is a forest preserve, 243 acres of wild lands. I spent a lot of time there as a kid, and for conditioning for track, they'd have us run from the school, to the preserve, around the loop trail in the preserve, and back up to school. Then we'd have practice. I'm not really sure of the distance. Maybe 3 total miles, maybe less. It was tough, I'd get to the practice field dead tired, panting, and in no mood to do time trials or sprints. I hated it, but kept pushing myself because I wanted desperately to fit in somewhere, and since one of my closest friends at the time was a track star, I thought that this might be my niche. It wasn't.

I'm not a good runner, or a fast one. They stuck me with running the 400, and I never won. I did it for only one season of track, I remember saying frequently at the time that "The only GOOD thing about running is when you stop." I never felt that endorphin high that everyone talked about.

In the spring of the year I lived in Sweden, my best friend and I looked at ourselves and realized we'd gained some weight over the winter. Which is really ridiculous, she was 5'7" and weighed maybe 140 and I was 5'2" and didn't weigh over 100, but I was 17 and she was 19 and we thought we were 'fat'. We embarked on a very ambitious journey, swimming 2 kilometers in the community pool after school on Mondays and Wednesdays, and running between 2 and 5 kilometers on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Fridays and Saturdays we drank. Sundays we recovered.

We made a list, that I still have, of things we agreed to not eat. Nothing fried. No more stopping for something to eat on the way home from the clubs on Saturday nights. The town's cafe/bakery made these donut sort of things called munkar, which were square, filled with a wonderful apple/sugar/cinnamon blend, and I agreed to stop buying them when I got out of school every afternoon. No ice cream.

We did get into better shape, but what I remember most is coming to the back door of my host family's house, panting, opening the door and calling out to my host-mum, Snalla, kan vi har lite vatern? (Please, can we get some water?) We weren't allowed into the house without taking off shoes, and we'd stretch in the backyard before going inside. The route that we ran took us though farm country, and I had to really work to get the mud off of those running shoes. I still hated it, and I remember mamman asking me why we didn't just walk if we hated it so much. I would tell her how we'd look so cute in our bathing suits during the coming summer and she would roll her eyes at me. She ought to have smacked me one, considering what I weighed and my body image at the time. Not that it would have smacked some sense into me, but still, I wince when thinking about how I used to whine about being fat at 17. Someone really should have given me a beat-down.

Through most of my college years, I lifted weights, but did very little cardio, and my weight gain really escalated after I got married. Sure, I walked in our old neighborhood from time to time. I exercised never, though. I joined a series of gyms, but never really got off the couch. The thing that's different this time around is that I now recognize and understand that the working out has to be part of my life every day for the rest of my life, that once I've gotten to the goal, I can't just stop doing whatever finally works to get the rest of the weight off. I might be able to do 3 days a week at the gym instead of 6, but it has to be a part of who I am and what I do for the rest of the time I'm on this earth.

And I finally get that runner's high. Each day, when I manage to get to the ten full minutes running, I feel like raising my hands over my head and cheering. I want to jump up and down and shout "LOOK!! I did it! Ten minutes!!! GO ME!" I restrain the impulse, but it is there.

I'm still having trouble with cramping in the tibia muscles, and it hurts when I stop running. Which is a complete 180 degree turn from where I was, that it was good to stop. I have been trying for about a week to get up over ten minutes (woot! 11 whole minutes!!) but I can't quite get there. It will come, I know. Patience has NEVER been my strong suit.

What I love about running is that it is now very meditative for me. I can't focus on anything else but breathing and putting one foot in front of the other. I can't think about anything else, and considering the craziness that is going on in my life right now, a blank slate, a clear head, is a wonderful thing. It doesn't last for but a few minutes after I get off the treadmill, but it is nice to experience while it does last.

I was out of bed at 4 this morning, giving up the battle to sleep even a few minutes longer after watching the clock from 3:17 AM on. Can't sleep, can't focus, don't want to do anything, endless circles of the same thoughts chasing around and around in my head. I was at Dr. Hottie's office last week, and he encouraged me to continue to use the Ambien to get the sleep I need. Muscle repair and your body's regeneration happens in stage 4 sleep, and I'm not getting even a minute of that. Dreams occur during REM sleep, stage two. I have very little of those, either. The sleeping pill gives me exceedingly weird, disjointed dreams, but also about 5 hours of sleep as opposed to the three or so I get without help.

So I'm continuing to chase after that elusive fitness goal, and a good night's sleep. But looking in the mirror this morning, I can finally see some muscle definition in my shoulders, and when I turn around and look at my back, there are two fewer rolls of fat. Twenty-two pounds lighter, and that's all the difference I can see. Guess my self-image still needs some work.

Finally, I'm jumping on a bandwagon that I've just discovered. Searching for new music to run to on iTunes the other day, I found Podrunner, produced by LA's DJ Steveboy. Once upon a time, dance hall and trip-hop was all I listened to. And then I figured out that it can get pretty damn annoying. But I'm in love with the mixes that Steveboy produces. I'm gooving to Paintshaker, which was featured the week that Podrunner had its four MILLIONTH download. So yeah, I'm behind the times a wee bit. I haven't subscribed to the podcast yet because I'm running out of space on my iPod, a project for the coming weekend is to delete everything that I haven't listened to since uploading most of my music library in January.

I hope your Tuesday doesn't suck out loud.

Scooter Libby Verdict

Yes, I know that the verdict was handed down earlier this week, but I've been busy writing about my obsession and International Women's Day, so this had to wait for a day when I am not being a really ridiculous fangirl. And since that is EVERY DAMN DAY, y'all....well, I think I can put it aside long enough to snark about the Idiot Administration. Right after I tell you that I resolved to stay off the forums for three whole days to see if I could do it, and....no. Couldn't. Oh, wait! I lied. I was off of the CW forum for 4 days, but only managed to stay off of JRAU for about 2. I was on the CW boards last night until one in the morning. Oy. Moving on....

No sooner was Scooter declared GUILTY of obstruction of justice than the media machine began cranking out rumours of a Presidential Pardon. While that would NOT be the dumbest thing that President Dumb Ass has done to date, (umm, going to war in Iraq gets my vote for the most idiotic thing that man has done) it would be the latest in a string of really stupid decisions. His presidency will be remembered in history as the most flawed American administration ever. Ever. The stonewalling of the media, the steadfast refusal to release information to the public, the tendency to steamroll over anyone who disagrees, the victory lap on the aircraft carrier....I digress. But it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if there is a presidential pardon.

I caught a snippet of an interview with one of the jurors on NPR or the Beeb, and he said it best, saying essentially that Scooter was the fall guy. Where is Karl Rove in all this? Why wasn't the Veep charged? Because you know that he ordered the outing of Valerie Plame as sure as you know that the sun rises in the east. Conspiracy theorist? Me? Well, yes.

Poor, poor Scooter. While I was searching for a link to the info about the guilty verdict, I found a website collecting donations for his defense fund. I'm not linking that simply because I refuse to lend credence to such idiots, their description blurb said "Because we know he's innocent." Yikes.

Let's start the pool now that he's not going to get any jail time at all. Anyone with me?

Scooter Libby

There is a lot that I want to say about the perjury trial of I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby. Most of it, I'm sure, is available from a myriad of other sources, but my opinion about the whole mess may not be.

First of all, I know what side of this whole debacle I ought to be on. The liberal side, which wants to string him up for outing a CIA agent. Yes, I agree, that was bad. Bad Scooter! And indicative, really, of the Idiot Administration's way of handling a problem. Ooohh, someone says that there's no WMDs in Iraq? Well, obviously, ob-vi-ous-ly, the way to deal with that is to discredit the critic's wife. Personal attacks on credibility being sooo much easier than actually talking about the facts, right?

And in many respects, I feel that if in fact Scooter outed Valerie Plame, maliciously, and then he lied about outing her, then yes, he ought to be strung up by his toenails, or whatever we're doing to punish the naughty this week. But on the other hand....this trial, at taxpayer expense, is essentially a he said-she said thing, with no real way to definitively prove anything one way or the other. So much high school style drama. There isn't forensic evidence that Scooter lied....how could there be? Sure, polygraph tests might show the truth, but in reality, there is no way show for certain what he knew, when he knew it, and who he told it to. There's also the fact that he's been charged with obstruction of justice and perjury when there's no underlying criminal case....usually obstruction of justice charges involve someone trying to cover up a homicide, for example. So the prosecutor has his work cut out for him in proving this case.

I'll admit that it is pretty darn damaging that a whole host of people have testified to the fact that he did, he did, he did it. I heard Nina Totenburg on NPR's Morning Edition this morning talking about how, in the tapes of the grand jury testimony, the prosecutor tiptoes around coming straight out and asking Libby if his boss (that would be Vice President Dick Cheney) told him to leak Plame's info, but the prosecutor never does come out and ask him directly, and nothing that Libby says through more than eight hours of testimony would indicate that Cheney did, in fact, tell him to release Plame's name.

Of course Libby never indicates that Cheney ordered him to out Plame; they're both reasonably intelligent people, and I would assume, being the conspiracy theorist that I am, that they'd be smart enough to have had these conversations about what to do, should either of them be in trouble, long before they ever got into trouble. Duh! Didn't you ever plan to do something you probably shouldn't have done, as a kid, and have the conversation with your friends, "Well, you just tell your mom xxx, and I'll tell my mom xxx, and we'll be fine." I know you did!! Guess what, those in political power are at least as smart as eight year olds, and they did the same thing.

At the heart of this whole trial for me is the issue of privacy. Yes, privacy. Valerie Plame had the right to privacy, the right to pursue a career that she was, by all accounts, good at and excited about, the right to live her life without such intense scrutiny, and that right was taken away from her. Whether Scooter Libby did it because his boss told him to, or not, the fact remains that Ms. Plame is no longer able to pursue her first choice of career, being a CIA spook, because she is now well known and recognizable. At the risk of sounding like I'm in high school, that's not fair. Not at all. Added to the fact that she is (as far as I know) no longer working for the CIA is the fact that her life could be in danger from this outing. Which is really unfair.

Privacy is, to me, one of those sacred rights. Yes, I know that I'm a big hypocrite for saying that, as I obsessively follow celebrity gossip. But! If you choose to be a celebrity, you know going into it that you're not going to have much of a chance at a private life. There are some trade offs...fabulously rich, the whole world on a string, screaming fangirls, et cetera. In general, I don't feel sorry for stars who whine about not being able to have a private life; I do feel sorry for them when the stalkeratzzi try to take pics of their kids or generally hound them. But I digress. Those of us who choose to go into less glamorous careers, who have ordinary lives, should be able to expect that our bidness isn't going to be splashed all over the six o'clock news. I dunno that being a CIA spook is an ordinary life, but for Valerie Plame, it was. The trial of Scooter Libby will resume on Monday. I'll be watching/listening.


Also: Wow. Wish I could write like this. Thanks to Mother Me for the link.

On the death of Saddam Hussein.

Scaryduck has already said most of what I think about this over on Duck News, but since I can never resist adding my own two cents worth, here's my take.

Is the world a better place without Saddam in power? You bet. Even those who hold the most strident anti-American views can't really argue with that fact. The guy gassed the Kurds, and made life a living hell for most of the citizens of Iraq. So it is a good thing that he's not the ruler of any nation. But I think his execution might go down in history as an act carried out by one of the biggest puppet governments in the history of the world, rather than justice served.

I count myself among those who are really surprised by the super-quick carrying out of the death sentence. When the rumblings began in the news a few days ago, I was kind of shocked. In my ever so humble opinion, of course, this has a lot more to do with W trying to improve his tarnished poll numbers than anything else. How could it? The democrats are really busy announcing who is going to run for president in 2008, and all the feel-good press they're getting over that results in daily pounding of the president's popularity. Remember the hoopla over the "we can't find Osama" distractions?

History is written by the victors; so in twenty years time, I wonder what the history books in countries who opposed the war will say versus here in the US.

Disturbing.

I heard a story on NPR this evening that's got me bothered. Seems that the US crime stats are in for the first half of 2006, and there's a disturbing increase in violent crimes. Why? You may well ask. Personally, I believe the assertion made by a commenter in the story, who implies that the super-increase in spending by the idiot administration on homeland security and cuts in spending on basic on-the-ground policing combine to make for a dangerous combination.

I am not one of those folks who dislikes saying "I told you so"; I love saying that. Locally, I had noted that our murder rate is up....the highest homicide rate here in my hometown was in the mid-nineties, and we're on par with that year for the homicide rate for 2006. Scary. But unmistakable, because every time there is another homicide, the local news goes ape-shit and points out that this is the xxx number murder in the city. And I've wondered if the city's inability to hire more cops has anything to do with the fact that the city's budget is being spent for things other than policing.

I intensely dislike the term, "Homeland Security", coined in the days after September 11th to describe the activities related to protecting the country from terrorism. All I can think every time I hear it is about Nazi Germany, and endless references to the Fatherland. I just can't get past that connection in my head, and therefore also I hear only mass paranoia in the voices of the administration when they talk about Homeland Security. Why on earth couldn't they have chosen another term? Something that says anti-terrorism more sanely than a term that conjures up visions of marching SS troopers? Oh, right, that's because we have a village in Texas that is missing its idiot as our president. I forgot for a sec.

Something else that is truly disturbing to me, and on a much lighter note, is the use of a song by The Soup Dragons, re-worked to sound more contemporary, in a Chase credit card commercial. This bothers my punk ideals. Rather a lot, actually. The song is "I'm Free" and I loved the whole album.

PS, this is my 101st post. Yay me!

quick random musings

I had to go to court for that speeding ticket last night. Now, if you know me IRL, you know that I'm rarely at a loss for words, even if they be catty words. But wow. Words kinda fail me about court. First of all, I thought that it was going to be just traffic court and it wasn't, so that was unpleasant surprise #1. There were people there who were accused of actual, real crimes, albeit misdemeanors, but still. Then, I am annoyed that it was supposed to start right at 5:30, and the judge didn’t enter the court room until 5:45. That’s really annoying. I run late all the time, for all kinds of things, most often for meeting up with my DH, but I expect things like COURT to start on time. They spent a whole lot of time talking about what your options are for pleading, guilty, no contest, not guilty, and the different types of bail. I was about the 15th person called, and maybe the 8th or so for a ticket. I started feeling better about what the fine might be after the very first person called for a ticket, because they got a $20 fine in addition to court costs, which I already knew were $65. So I plead no contest, told the judge how I’ve never had a ticket in my life (and hello, I am 31 years old!) and that I was embarrassed. He fined me $35, since it was a school zone, and I wrote a check for $100. I had expected a fine between $200-300, so I feel like I got off relatively easy. I completely forgot to ask; how many points will I end up with? So I have to call the court today to find out.

I’m running late this morning and need to get a shower and head out the door to work, so even though I’ve got lots more to say about a bunch of other things, I’ve got to run.


Here’s the tease, though…I’m going to write for a food blog! I’m very very excited about it.

In which I hold forth at great length about the death penalty

The death penalty. Doesn’t get much more serious than that, does it? Just like there are no tasteful September 11th jokes, there are no tasteful death penalty jokes. So even though I want to make some flippant remark, because I’m a smartass by nature, I’m holding myself back.

I believe in the death penalty, for many reasons, but first let’s talk about how I think it oughta be expanded. Yes, expanded. I think that if you are a serial rapist, a serial pedophile, a chronic child abuser, or even someone who commits vehicular homicide on your 16th DUI, you ought to be eligible for the death penalty. Now I know that in Saudi Arabia, if you steal something, they cut off your hand. I don’t advocate going that far, but I do think that there are folks out there who can’t be rehabilitated, and at some point, we should stop trying. How much of your hard-earned tax dollars is enough money to spend warehousing, feeding, and educating someone who raped 3 grandmothers? Personally, my answer to that is less than one red cent. There’s a bit that comedian Ron White does about the Texas state legislature putting in an “express lane” to the death penalty. The bit is funny, but every time I’ve seen him do it, rather than laugh, the crowd cheers enthusiastically. Makes ya think that maybe folks are more pro-death penalty than you think.

Oh, I’ve heard all the arguments about Illinois and their mistakes on death row. And the journalism students that totally exonerated a man on death row with DNA evidence. I’ve checked out The Innocence Project And yeah, there are definitely times when the cops and DAs and legal system get it wrong. But when it is YOUR kid or aunt or mother…I would want the maximum penalty. I stood in Barnes & Noble and then at a big box retailer that I don’t like to admit that I ever darken their doors and read most of Sharon Rocha’s For Laci while standing in the book aisle. In which she says memorably, “Divorce is always an option. Not murder.” The argument against the death penalty, of course, being that even if whoever murdered your loved one is put to death, your loved one is still dead. True story, as my sister often says. A friend of my DH’s died when I was about 22; she was only 26. She died as a result of horrible medical mistakes, and I didn’t know her parents very well at the time. I asked DH if her parents would sue the hospital and doctors who caused her premature and awful death. No, he thought, because they would say that it wouldn’t bring her back. He was right; they opted to not sue, although I thought then and still think now that they would have had an ironclad, watertight case. I’m digressing again. No, killing the murderer who took your loved one away does NOT bring them back. I know that. But I really think that if the death penalty were expanded, the murder rate would go down. In Sweden (here she goes again touting Sverige as utopia) if you drive drunk, you lose your license. Period. Forever. No “work and school privileges” no reinstatement fees and you get it back. Nope. Drive drunk, lose your license. Guess what their rate of traffic fatalities caused by drunk drivers might be. Just guess.

So that’s my take on the death penalty.

On to more usual fare....the Supreme Court sidestepped another Roe v. Wade case, for which we can all breathe a sigh of relief, but the thought occurs to me that eventually, they're going to stop sidestepping it, and step right into it.

Hope ya’ll are having a good one.

the happenings keep hitting and the hits keep happening

So the cooking class that I took up at Lyndhurst was a blast. Learned some new recipes, had a good time, didn't really pick up any new friends, I don't think, but I do think everyone in the class enjoyed themselves. There was one guy who sat next to me that I liked, but I don't need another unattached (that is, single) guy friend...I have several and most, although not all, of them drive my DH crazy. But I'm a green-eyed monster myself when it comes to single female friends of his, so I can't blame him. There was a really sweet girl who told me about her sorority in college and the volunteer work that she did with them, she seemed very nice, but I didn't get her name. Dammit. Got home late (for me) last night and am feeling like I need a caffeine IV drip to get up and running today. That sounds like I'm a computer: Reboot? = yes, with at least 4 more hours of sleep, please.

Have you heard about Haleigh Poutre? I'm relieved that the Massachusetts Superior Court ruled that her stepfather who is being held in her savage beating was denied the right to make medical decisions on her behalf. Common sense. What a refreshing turn of events. This LINK is to the NPR story where I heard about her. The MA Superior Court found that her stepfather had given no evidence of providing a loving nurturing nature in his contact with her. They also said the following, for which I applaud them.

“To recognize the petitioner as a de-facto parent was unthinkable.

” My heart is breaking. It is likely that this little girl will die from the injuries she sustained in the beating. Child abuse is something I will not ever understand. Especially as a woman. How on earth do you carry a child for 9 months or thereabouts, give birth to that child, then hurt that child or allow someone else to hurt that child? This is NOT one of the issues where I straddle the fence. I'm not against spanking; I think an occasional swat to the be-hind is not a terrible thing. Reinforces your point, so to speak. This is all moot, since I don't have any kids, but I do know how I feel about abuse. I'm a firm believer in eye-for-an-eye justice in abuse cases. If they find Haleigh's stepfather guilty of causing her injuries, I think it would be perfectly acceptable for someone to hit him with a baseball bat and push him down a flight of stairs, as he allegedly did to her. I cannot imagine what an 11 year old could have possibly done

wrong

” or

“bad

” to merit such a beating.

I AM a sheltered girl from the 'burbs, who grew up in a very nice home, with a (mostly) stable family [no offense to ANYONE I'm related to, but we do have a nut or two in our family tree, and you know it.] and because that's my experience, I admit to a very high degree of naïveté. Most of the time, I think that what most people are telling me to my face is the truth. I don'’t sugarcoat much of anything when I'’m talking to you, but you'’re also going to get my real opinion and the truth from me. Part of the reason I don'’t work for that big ol' bank anymore is that they'’d ask my opinion, I'’d give it, truthfully, and it would be more truth than they could handle. Then they labeled me

“not a team player

” because I wasn'’t a yes-woman. You can'’t win, sometimes. Sigh. I digress. Here'’s where I was heading before sidestepping. Several folks that I work with now tell me that abused kids don'’t know any different; just as I think that everyone'’s family dynamic is similar to mine, those who are abused think everyone'’s family is like that, that everyone is abused. If you don'’t know me IRL, you probably think I'’m a social worker. I'’m not...but a lot of what I do every day would easily fit the typical social worker job description.

I thought today that I was going to write about my death penalty POV, but that hasn'’t happened. Maybe next week. Just as I was DEE-LIGHTED when Pres. Doofus was disappointed in the Supreme Court ruling, I am DEE-LIGHTED today to have heard that one of the democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee has said that he won'’t vote for Sam Alito, although I do caution everyone that what usually happens when a nominee is not confirmed is that the president usually goes even farther into conservative territory. So keep your fingers crossed for a positive outcome on that.

Thank goodness it is Friday, I am looking forward to pleasant weather (for Ohio, ‘tannyrate) this weekend and will be thinking about what I want to say about the death penalty next week. I'm attending a sporting event tonight, one of the few sports that I like, hockey. :-) Hope they win.