18 March 2008

Dear Applicant

Thank you for your interest in the position at Institution ABC.

The search committee has reviewed resumes and wishes to inform you that we have interviewed candidates and hired a candidate whose background and experience is more suitable for the position. We encourage you to monitor our website for further position announcements.

Thank you for taking the time to apply for the position and for your interest in the institution and making a difference. I wish you well in your job search.


Sincerely,

Jane Smith


Urgh. If I get another one of these letters this week, I'm going to run away, live off the grid, breed sheep, use their wool to spin into thread, and knit for a living. Or something.

Yes, the letter above is copied and pasted from my e-mail, with the name of the institution obscured and the position I was interested in removed.


The hell of all of this is that I'm starting to lose that most precious of human commodities, hope.

Each time I send my resume somewhere, I'm so hopeful that I'll be able to leave behind the job that I don't like. I get an interview, or I get a positive initial response, and the hopes raise higher.

Then I don't get the job.

The rejection tests my strength, often making me want to climb into bed and hide away from the world for a while. Some days I'm successful; some days not. I haven't lost all hope yet, but I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever be able to find another job. More importantly, will I ever find a job that I love as much as I loved my non-profit work?


I did get an offer for one I interviewed for last week. Unfortunately, I only went to the interview because it never hurts to stay in practice and have a chat with a potential employer. It was a waste of my time; I knew within seconds of walking in the door that I would never be able to work in that office. Full of overgrown fraternity boys and misogyny to spare. And then the job was to be an investment broker; thanks, but absolutely not. Ever.

I'm smart; creative, funny, polite (sometimes), eloquent, talented....I could go on. I've got a 4 year degree, speak 3 languages, am an incredibly quick study.


Too bad that I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I could figure out what to do with all that potential.

Perhaps I should say *IF* I grow up; at the moment, I don't think there's much danger.



5 comments:

MotherMe said...

What's so ridiculous about living off the grid and raising sheep??? That's what I'd like to know.

Lucy Arin said...

Nothing!

Knitting for a living might be overstepping the bounds, though...it'd be downright tough to make enough $$ to live on.

Dawna said...

Wow! I know EXACTLY how you feel. Exactly. Job hunting for me is relatively moot- I'm always "too much" for whatever position and end up waiting by the phone forever. Man that really hurts my self-esteem and drives me to tears.

How can people like us handle the rejection?! It kills me!!

Anonymous said...

Think of how lovely your hands will be from all the lanolin--on the other cuff, rejection just plain sucks. Sorry to hear this.

Beau Radley
somewhere by the salt sea in the great Pac NW

Lucy Arin said...

Dawna-
Right? Seems worse somehow if you've got depression, its hard to not allow these things to send me tail-spinning.

Beau-
If only! I don't have any sheep, in fact I think the home owner's association here JUST might kill me if I decided that a few lambs would solve all my problems. Unfortunately. Someday, maybe. :) Thanks for your comment.