The Idiot Tours South America

Greetings to the people of South America from President Idiot!

Everywhere I go, I'm met with people who are so happy to see me that police in riot gear are needed. It is so wonderful to be loved so much by all the world. I can't read the signs that the people are carrying, but my handlers assure me they're full of love and support for the troop increases in Iraq.

I'm sorry that my visit to Columbia had to be so short...but unlike when my predecessors visited your beautiful country, I just couldn't do a popular reception. Not at all because I would have been met with rocks, slogans, chanting and protest signs, that had nothin' to do wit it, I promise.

The 'merican media back home isn't reporting on the Mayan people's intent to hold a 'cleansing ceremony' at a sacred site AFTER the motorcade has left, thank goodness, it might give some liberals ideas about cleansing Congress. Oh, wait, I forgot, the 2006 Congressional elections did that already. Silly me!

But I bet that most 'mericans don't even know that I'm out of the country. Not to worry, I'll be back to keep things messed up until early 2009 very soon!

~Love,

W.